Monday, May 17, 2010

How To: Not Have A Broken Heart

Number of emails from people with broken heart: 874,498,387

And millions of heart are hurting and broken, in the world right now.

I hope this little post will help some hearts...somewhere.

SCENE 1: you have just been left with a heart that feels so broken, you just want to sleep, you don't want to be awake and feel anything! You can't imagine how your life will go on with any kind of happiness without this person in your life. You are already imagining, that no one will ever be as great as them.

SCENE 2: you have been or are in an abusive relationship, someone that verbally abuses you (saying horrible hurtful things that will forever scar your heart), physically abuses you (hurting you in any way), mentally abuses you (controls you, manipulates situations, scares you, threatens you), or even sexually abuses you (any form of touching that you don't want).
now enters the voice of help!

For #1 with a
broken heart: No one that is willing to let you go or hurt your heart, or leave you...is good enough to EVER be the one to hold your precious heart in their hands. Someone that has no idea how amazing you are, how irreplaceable you are, how unique how adorable, how beautiful, how someone will come into your life and say, "I don't ever want to live without you in my life, and I'll never, ever think of leaving you!". Someone is going to adore how you laugh, love the sound of your voice, think that you make everything more fun, how you are the most amazing thing they've ever seen, that nothing could take them away from you. That they'd walk through fire, drive for hours, just to see your face.
If you ARE or WERE with someone that didn't realize you were the best thing on Earth....GOOD RIDDANCE!!! Because they don't deserve one more second of your time or tears!
You are one of a kind amazing! They way you say things, the way you laugh, the way you dance or sing, the funny things you so, the quirky things you do...these are all what someone is going to FALL HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE WITH!!! And if someone doesn't...DON'T waste your time with them...because the person that's going to LOVE all those things and you, is rejoicing that, that other person is out of the way, so they can come and find you!
Even though I don't normally listen to country music, I love the song, "God Bless the Broken Road" by Rascal Flatts 
in the song it says,
"Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

This is beautiful....that each person that broke your heart, needed to get out of your life, so the right one, one that will never hurt you, can come into your life. They will adore you, cherish you, and gently hold your heart, and will go out of their way to make sure your heart is never hurt! 
I've been hurt many times, I've been cheated on, dumped, I've been in abusive relationships, and I'm so glad I'm not in any of those anymore! I even dated a guy that told me how beautiful he thought other girls were and how he had "crushes" on them, in front of me! (oh brother!) Thank goodness I said "enough!", they dumped me, or I got the courage to leave them, and end that horrible time in my life!


Now for #2
an abusive relationship
If you are with someone that constantly hurts your feelings, makes you feel miserable, unhappy, stupid, ugly, sad, depressed, worthless...ANY one of those! That is not a soul mate....that is a mean mate!
And if you are with someone that hurts you, hits you, threatens you (with anything) scares you for any reason, (especially if they drink or do drugs...they will think even worse!).
I was in an abusive relationship, where I was afraid of everything, I was afraid to leave my house, I was told horrible things, I was threatened, and he had a huge anger problem, the police had to be called, I didn't have any money or any food to eat. And the horrible part was, I was so afraid to leave him, that he would be even more mad and find me. Or he would promise me he wouldn't do any of that again and he was sooooo sorry! WELL THAT'S THE ABUSIVE CYCLE!!! (THEY'RE MEAN, THEN THEY FEEL BAD, APOLOGIZE, SAY THEY WON'T DO IT AGAIN.....AND JUST WAIT...IT'S A GUARANTEE THEY'LL DO IT AGAIN! It just comes down to how long you're going to stay and keep going through that emotional cycle.


I prayed and asked God to get me out of there! And sure enough, it was by a miracle, we were getting kicked out of the apartment we lived in, I called my mom, she bought me a plane ticket, he even drove me to the airport, and once I was safely at my mom and dad's, I said, I can't come back. I's had enough! I knew, this wasn't how it was supposed to be. Your heart heart shouldn't hurt when you're in love!


So, to each of you precious souls...you were made so fantastically! You are funny, witty, brilliant, cute, adorable, you have your own style, your own way of making people's lives fun. People should want to be wherever you are....because wherever you are....life is more fun, because you are in it!


Don't settle...you deserve the best! And the best is waiting for this "broken heart" to be pointed in their direction, that whoever hurt you, is the Northern Star, that is pointing you right to the one that will  NEVER, EVER hurt you.


And remember, your girlfriend, boyfriend, husband or wife....is not your whole world! They are there to support and be a companion, but remember, as soon as they get placed on a pedestal....that's a promise that you are putting them too high on your life list...and you're giving them control to definitely hurt you! Every human being at some point will disappoint you, hurt you, make you sad...they aren't perfect. The only person who's never stop loving me is God. Boyfriends, girlfriends, even husbands and wives (ha ha ha), may come and go...but God and your family will always be there love you!


I love you...and don't let another tear fall from your eyes. I wish I could be there to hug you and tell you, "No, rejoice that now, you're true soul mate, is free to find you! Be patient, they are on their way!"


I made this BREAK-UP BOOTCAMP video, maybe it will inspire your heart too!
huge love, chocolate and lots of love, typed with love, kandee